She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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