you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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