There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
