I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
