...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
