ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
