Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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