he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
