If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
