I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
