you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize