I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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