Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
