I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize