Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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