My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
