He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
