It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
