Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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