before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
