im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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