She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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