I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
