Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
