dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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