What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
