White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize