i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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