Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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