So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize