taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
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