I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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