I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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