Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
