i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
You don't make any sense
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