I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
