For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
