Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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