Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
