so that wasnt chicken after all
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
