My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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