Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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