mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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