a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
