Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
