In the future we'll all be gay
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize