i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Randomize
