Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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