I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize