So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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