She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Man, jail baloney is awful.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
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