West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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