Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
